Leave or not to leave, the contradictions between morality and conscienceHe was born in 80, divorce, a man in Beijing. He is a very frank person, said earlier, what is clear, he said not force me to do that, we never talk about emotional issues.
I was born in 85, also divorced, have a boyfriend now, all in Guangdong.
can't remember how did know, and can't remember how did add QQ friends, just remember we know up to now is 6 years, 6 years, we never ask about each other's name, phone and work, but never mentioned meeting, does this count as a kind of tacit understanding it? Such a relationship for 6 years. He had said and I chat, is not that casually chat chat even has of, he said not know why and I chat are is heart, are is he wants to said words, actually I also has this feel, feel and he in with is natural also is happy, actually so years we and no on had any we himself feelings of thing, just chat chat, each in online see has on wants to life in the familiar years of friends as, naturally of chat up has, no hard of topic, also no rules of topic, on such said with words. Until he did not show like how I feel this year, signalled in the words and language of all, he knows that I have a boyfriend, so I say don't expect I'm just always waiting for me just fine. Until one day in October this year in chat, his mood is very low, that is, that was the day I decided to go to Beijing to see him, that's the day that we don't know each other's name and phone number. If not a joke that night chatting he inadvertently, I think I should be in accordance with the original plan was to buy a ticket to Beijing, because of that one word I was calm down or contradiction. He said whether I go or not go he won't be angry, as long as I want to decided on the line, as long as I don't regret it in the future on the line. In fact, I'm not afraid she'll regret it later, from the day I decided to go to Beijing had been preparing to go to Beijing, because Guangdong is much colder than in Beijing, but now I have very conflicting. Last night all night, maybe I was selfish, decided to go to Beijing at the moment, I didn't want to stand in my boyfriend's position on the issue, nor did he stand in his position on the issue, but wanted to see him, they decided to go, now that I think I'm too selfish, too greedy. Boyfriend thought of this should be regarded as betrayal, if the met might be different; after is not our term for him, is also seen changes nothing, he he, I'm still me, maybe see would make him less happy. Meet maybe like most users, like death at first sight. All I want is the end.
I've always been a very conservative girl and I since we got married only a year of marriage, no children, divorced is because her ex-husband had the other girl, but I really cannot accept this, so I chose to leave. Although divorced once, but has existed in my ideas, my mother taught traditional thinking, my boyfriend, and now in its fourth year, but I never thought about marriage, perhaps of marriage is still in a State of fear, I do not believe in marriage, so no matter how much family reminders has been dragged. This is my problem now, at the thought of getting married I would want to escape all of my wedding. I never thought that I would one day face the kind of problems. But to say I'm dying to see him, although I know morals or conscience, I don't think, but I really wanted to see him. I know met does not represent anything, simply meet, eat dinner and friends who are online, but things were not so simple in other people's eyes. I was in conflict, and I've decided, then things are going to do it, even if later regret I will full pressure in the depths of my heart, but this time I really don't know what to do.
first decided to see his time there for a week, and then I began to feel worried, not because she's afraid she'll regret it later, but contradictions between morality and conscience let me even more worried about so-called meet death at first sight.